What If?

ang susunod nyong mababasa ay pawang kathang-isip at kalokohan lamang. parental guidance is advised (i'm about to unleash a partial force of my insanity to the world!!!!! wahahahaha!)
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med students are said to have O-C components in their personalities, else they wouldnt be good docs. so technically, being an OC is a normal, integral part of being a med student. but what if we manifest more than OC-ness? would we still be considered "normal", if the other personality disorders took over?
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Scenario: a noisy classroom; the president of the class is trying to make an announcement...

the president is PARANOID
Pres: "announcement!... (class quiets down) We will be having a lecture tomorrow at 8 but I will be moving around the venue until the last minute...
classmate: "bakit naman?"
Pres: "baka ma-infiltrate tayo ng spies from section A! kailangan nating lumaban! pinadala sila ng U.S., ng CIA para makasigurong walang Pilipinong doktor ang makarating dun!"
classmate: "may Pilipino naman sa section A, pano mo nasabi yun?"
Pres: "they're working for the enemy!! wag kayong maniwala, yun ang gusto nilang isipin nyo!! phil-am ang presidente nila! basta, the venue for the lec will be texted tomorrow... burahin nyo agad kasi may self-destruct yung message..."

the president is SCHIZOID
Pres: (just talks normally in front of the class) "announcement, we will be having a lecture at 12-2pm tomorrow." (sits back down in the corner)
noisy class: "ano raw? ha?, paki-ulit nman ung announcement"
Pres: (from the corner) "we will be having a lecture at 12-2pm tomorrow."
class: "wala tayong lunch? kausapin mo nman ung prof..."
Pres: "wala tayong lunch. kayo nalang kumausap sa prof. wala akong paki. basta sinabi ko na ung announcement. bahala na kayo."

the president is SCHIZOTYPAL
Pres: "good morning everyone! tomorrow, we would have our daily stroll into the complexities of the human mind! our exceptional professors would be gracing us with a beautifully rendered powerpoint presentation at 3pm."
class: "saan yung venue?"
Pres: "doon tayo sa CA, mas maganda ang CHI flowing through that room, its like, the spirits of all the med students who studied there are guiding us and helping us make a more telepathic connection with our professors."

the president is DEPENDENT
Pres: "uhm.. class, eto na ang vice president para mag-announce..."
VP: "ok class, may choice daw tayo ng lecture time and place, saan nyo gusto?"
class: "kayo na bahala basta maaga tayo umuwi"
Pres: "ha? kayo na magdecide please... sigurado kayong ok lang? baka mali ung ma-sched namin eh, baka may mag-reklamo, may ma-hassle... si VP nlang mag-aayos... pag may problema, punta kayo kay VP..."

the president is BODERLINE
Pres: announcement! hoy class, makinig nman kayo... bakit nyo ko binoto kung ayaw nyo makinig? ganun ba ko ka-walang kwenta? pipigilan nyo ba ako pag tumalon ako sa ilog sa likod ng ospital?
class: (tumahimik) nakkinig na kami! wag kang ma-depress. sige na, anong announcement?
Pres: sasabihin ko lang nman na napa-payag ko ang mga prof na mas maaga tayong pauwiin eh...
class: YAY! galing mo naman! we love you!!
Press: "hahahaha! Of Course! I'm The Best! hahahahaha!... ... sandali, may announcement pa, hoy makinig kayo... please... bakit ba walang nakikinig sakin?... tatawid na ako ng Aurora nang naka-pikit... "

the president is HISTRIONIC
secretary: People, settle down. Here he is... our Prrresident! ... OLIVER!!!!

the president is NARCISSISTIC
class: "bakit wala na tayong sched buong sem?"
Pres: "pinaayos Ko. Gusto kong March-May ang class eh."
class: "ha? summer break yun eh?!"
Pres: "kaya?! AKO ang PRESIDENTE!! AKO ang masusunod!!! ayaw mo?, MGA KAWAL! PUGUTAN NA YAN!"

the president is AVOIDANT
classmate: "kausapin mo nman ung prof, para ma-resched ng mas maaga ung lec, un lang pasok natin eh"
Pres: "ha, ikaw na, baka magalit sila sakin... ang 'demanding' ko naman."
classmate: "ok, ako kakausap, i-announce mo nalang sa class"
Pres: "ikaw nalang, baka isipin mo kinukuha ko credit ng pag-kausap sa prof tapos sabihin pa ng mga kaklase natin na 'feeling president' ako..."

the president is ANTISOCIAL
class: "bakit di mo sinabi na nag-resched ang 8am class natin?! galit tuloy ang prof!"
Pres: "ha? nakalimutan ko eh, inaasikaso ko pa yung classroom natin for today. dun pala tayo sa ana amphi..."
class: (punta sa locked ana amphi) wla nmang class dito eh! nasan na ung Pres? san ba talaga tayo?!
classmate: "nakita ko kanina sumasakay nang taxi, mag- wwall climbing daw siya sa Rockwell."

what if I was the president? Personality disorder-NOS (not otherwise specified)
~bwahahahahahaha!!!!
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for aubrey, who is currently feeling the stress of being the president of the class... para ma-detox ka muna.
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hehehehe... i was reading peronality disorders in kaplan when i got the idea for my blog for you... ayun. enjoy.

---kzs---